My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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