is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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