I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize