Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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