is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
