Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize
