did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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