He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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