He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
