I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
operation have a gay friend backfired
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
