do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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