Christians are straight up FREAKS
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
