She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
