I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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