I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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