can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
