Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
