That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
