You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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