Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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