EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
