There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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