it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I think my vagina is haunted
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
im having a threesome with these popsicles
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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