So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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