Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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