i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
