If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
