I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize