I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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