Do vagina's smell?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize