The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
