Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Randomize
