i think my mom watched the whole time
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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