Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
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I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
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When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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