My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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