he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
