haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
