Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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