How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
