i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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