btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize