If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.