Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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