Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
