And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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