we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
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