he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
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How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I got inside last night via doggy door
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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