we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
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