I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
