there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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