They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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