i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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