If i come over, it means nothing
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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